inland empire (David Lynch, 2006)

Emotionless and depressed bunnies, cheapskate Harry Dean Stanton, Polish thugs saying cryptic things in between beatings of their women, the most unnecessary cameo in the history of cinema by William H. Macy, screwdrivers in the abdomen and ketchup all over a wifebeater as the latest fashion statements, Laura Dern
a) and her Merry Band of Hos
b) puking blood
c) playing redneck housewife
d) making scary faces for the camera
e) regailing her sadomasochistic exploits to either a psychiatrist, a bum, a mobster, or all of the above,

hot, drugged out chicks admiring each other’s tits before lipsynching The Locomotion, some homeless asian chick rambling about torn vaginas and pet monkeys, Mrs. Palmer ruining the image of Eastern European immigrants, and Jeremy Irons.

am I making sense yet? No? Because David Lynch sure as hell wasn’t. Supposedly he just shot random shit as it came to his head, and boy does it show. Where the hell is the perfect combination of randomness and coherency, the perfect contrast between real life and the subconscious that made Mulholland Dr. as masterful as it was? It’s like he just up and decided to abandon any sense of the real and just delve straight into the human psyche and dreams and nightmares, and for three fucking hours at that. It’s as if the word subtelty has completely left this man’s vocabulary. It’s that subtelty and the ability to restrain that urge to overdo it with the signature Lynchian style that made Blue Velvet, Twin Peaks, and Mulholland Dr. so damn compelling, because it was still steeped in the real, and therefore we could identify, at least to an extent, with the people, their situations, and even their psyches, because all the oddities and randomness was kept at bay and used where it was needed. But I’m beginning to think that those works are anomalies at this point, and that Lynch’s real M.O. is overly-stylized, incomprehensible, and laughably “artsy” and over-directed crud like Eraserhead, Lost Highway, and now Inland Empire. Kudos to Laura Dern, at least, for showing off her acting range in multiple roles (at least I think it was multiple roles, but with material like this, who the fuck knows…). and all i could think of was how this would make a GREAT mst3k episode, and how it was like a Lynchian episode of Robot Chicken or a Don Hertzfeldt cartoon.


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